January 29, 2015

Why don’t you have clients?

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On Monday I started replying to the question below and realized that I needed to deliver this to you in a series.  This is part 2!  If you missed part one, you can see it HERE.

Q:  I’m having such a hard time getting clients and sometimes I can’t get past that I’m probably doing my business all wrong.  I wonder if I’m ever going to get anywhere significant with my business.  What can I do when I get stuck?

A:  [Part2]

Four ways to get past your subconscious trying to stop you:

1.  Awareness
2.  Truth
3.  Gratitude
4.  Action

Have you ever wondered why you’re not getting the clients you want?

Usually, the first thing that used to happen to me when things would begin to go wrong, not work out for me, or it would seem like everything was against me I’d immediately go into my head.

I would start saying things like this to myself and anyone who would listen (I’ve added some statements that I’ve heard many other photographers say, too, when commiserating):

* “Maybe I’m just not meant to have a business right now.”
* “My kids are most important to me, so maybe this is a sign from the universe that I’m supposed to NOT do my business.”
* “The economy is in a terrible place right now.  No one is buying anything  Especially not luxury things like photography.”
* “No one around here really values photography.”
* “If I’m going to have any chance of getting someone to book me, I’m going to have to do some major educating.”
* “Everyone wants to pay hardly anything for photography.”
* “There are so many DIY people in my area.  No one wants to actually PAY for photography.”
* “Not a day goes past that some newbie enters the industry and undercuts all of the years I’ve been in business.”

Where are you looking?

When things get complicated and difficult in our businesses we want to look around for something, someone, anything to excuse our shortcoming or pin the blame on.  Anyone but ourselves.  When we feel like we’ve been busting it like crazy we don’t want to see the ways that we’ve not been measuring up.  That’s absolutely no fun to face.

Becoming aware of what we are saying, how we are thinking, what affect it’s having on the state of you and on the state of your business.  Is it helping?  Is it opening up all kinds of ideas and opportunities for you to continue to believe what you’re believing?  Why are you believing what you’re saying?  Is it giving you an out?  A reason to not do the work you know you need to do?  What are you resisting?

What happens when you start paying attention?

When you can become aware and begin honestly answering these types of questions you’ll be able to start seeing more clearly.

You will become aware not just to what’s stopping you but also to what’s keeping you paralyzed.  This idea and these questions are applicable, not just to our businesses but to our parenting and relationships as well.

Opportunities you never saw before will suddenly appear in your life.  Not because they weren’t there before but because you were not able to see them.

I used to give a lot of the excuses, justifications, and explanations about why my business wasn’t working/thriving or why clients weren’t knocking down my door.

Now I know that so much of what I was doing back then was not being aware, closing myself off to possibility in the process.

Why was I stuck?

I came to a point where I knew **I** was the reason I wasn’t moving forward and why my business wasn’t taking off.  I finally became aware of what I was doing to keep myself stuck.

But I didn’t know what I didn’t know. 

I couldn’t see my way out of it.  Even though I was pretty sick and tired of being in limbo land with my business, I still didn’t know my next step.  And even more bugged that I had already built an incredible business once and was struggling so much to build it a second time, I didn’t realize that so much of it all came down to awareness.

Once I started working with my coach she began helping me to be more aware of what I did and didn’t do.  I began seeing how I would go to the edge of booking someone and then pull back.  I started to see how I expected people to come to me rather than stepping into my own power and going to the people I wanted to work with.  I realized how paralyzed I was in so many instances by worrying about what other people thought.

Awareness showed me the truth.

The truth was that I was afraid not that there was no one who wanted to book the kind of sessions I shoot.  The truth was that I wasn’t acting on opportunities to work with people and following through.  The truth was that I wasn’t going to where my ideal clients were because I was afraid.  The truth was that me staying behind my computer screen was less scary than what someone might say about me as a photographer or business owner.

When I saw the truth choices opened up to me.  I could stay where I was or could step into the unknown of my gifts, talents, potential, and who knew what else.

The choices were exciting and the world seemed to open up again in a way it hadn’t been opened to me before I became aware of the ways I was keeping myself stuck.

Today:

1. pay attention
2. notice when you blame someone or something else or a circumstance for why you’re stuck, angry, bugged, or frustrated
3. when you notice that you’re blaming ask yourself, “how does me blaming someone else allow me to stay stuck?”
4. listen for the truth

Stay tuned! I’m going to share how the other two things, gratitude and action, will help you breakthrough the stuff you’re believing about yourself and your business. Don’t miss the rest of this series.  Sign up for my email list!

Happiness,
Davina

PS If things like this keep you from doing what you know you’re really supposed to do in this world, sign up for a call with me HERE. I’d love to talk!

2012-09-05_1346872111Davina Fear is Business Coach for Creative Women who want to be more fearless in their life and business.  She’s also a Familyness Adventurer and Life Story Photographer. She has a Parks and Recreation addiction.  Literally.

January 27, 2015

Q&A: When will I ever think I’m a for real photography business?

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Q:  I’m having such a hard time getting clients and sometimes I can’t get past that I’m probably doing my business all wrong.  I wonder if I’m ever going to get anywhere significant with my business.  What can I do when I get stuck?

A:  When we are young we learn stories about ourselves and about what life is supposed to look like, how we are supposed to act, what we are supposed to do.

Whether we realize it or not we build a life around those beliefs.  Often those beliefs come from generations of believers in your family.  Sometimes those beliefs center on what women do and don’t do in your family, what money is for and what it’s not for, how you spend it and how you don’t spend it.

Some of these stories serve us and some of them don’t.

No matter what, our subconscious wants to keep us in the stories that we’ve always known.  Those stories are safe to belief.  Those stories and the ones that keep us where we are.

What being stuck means

The most important thing to our subconscious part of our life is that we stay where we are.  The subconscious part of us is what controls our body.  It’s the part that immediately goes to work the second our body gets a fever and it works tirelessly, pulling out all of the stops, doing whatever it takes to get our body back to zero (or 97.2 degrees).  That’s the subconscious’s job.  It’s constantly protecting us and keeping us right where we are…in the safety zone.

Except that’s not what we always need.  Our subconscious does NOT like change.  The thing it loves the most is ABSOLUTELY NO CHANGE.  If something changes, it completely FREAKS OUT.  And it will do anything it can to get you to stay the way you are.  Your subconscious will pull out all of the stops, try everything at it’s disposal, to keep you right where you’re at.

Freaking out!

So when you try a new way to parent or a new business practice or meet someone new.  Your subconscious at some point will FREAK OUT.

It will pull out the stops trying to keep your from doing the new thing.  If it has to resort to calling you names, telling you you’re worthless, that you can’t do this, that you’re not enough and you never will be, that you’re just not cut out for art or numbers or this parenting gig.  It’s not because all of that stuff is true, it’s because you are making your subconscious very uncomfortable and so it’s throwing out everything it can to get you to JUST STOP TRYING TO CHANGE!

When we get hurt by something someone has said about us or told us about ourselves, when we don’t live up to the ideal mom person we’ve built up in our head (even though we knew in our heart that that mom is not the best mom for you to be or for your kids to have) when we know that a change has to be made in our business and that where never we try to make changes ourselves and it keeps not working out then the subconscious mind goes on red alert :REVERSE REVERSE!!

Four ways to get past your subconscious trying to stop you:

1.  Awareness
2.  Truth
3.  Gratitude
4.  Action

During this week I’m going to share how these four things will help you breakthrough the stuff you’re believing about yourself and your business.  Make sure not to miss this series by getting on my email list.

Happiness,
Davina

PS If things like this keep you from doing what you know you’re really supposed to do in this world, sign up for a call with me HERE. I’d love to support you in moving out of stuck-ness and toward more freedom!

davina_bio_photo_3_squareDavina Fear is Business Coach for Creative Women who want to be more fearless in their life and business.  She’s also a Familyness Adventurer and Life Story Photographer. Dinner time is one of her favorite times of day as long as she doesn’t have to make dinner by herself.

 

December 26, 2014

When DIY-ing Your Business Stops Working

I keep thinking about you (but not in a creepster way)

We just got home from seeing the movie Alexander and the Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day!  If you’re up for something hilarious that will make you happy to know that your family is not alone on the crazy train…then definitely go see it!

Sometimes it can feel like our businesses are heading in a horrible, no good, very bad direction.  It can feel that way if it feel like nothing is going right or if everything just feels blah or if we just feel burnt out.  There is hope!

I’ve been thinking about you as I’ve been getting ready for my coaching program to launch on Monday, December 29th (NOTE: I think I may have said January 29th in my video but it’s totally THIS Monday, December 29th.  Oops!).  The reason I’ve been thinking about you so much is because I know you have questions and I want to answer them for you.

CLICK on the photo above to find out about what DIY and my business have to do with each other.

This video will answer some of these questions for you:

Why do I need coaching when I’ve got books I’m reading, the internet, and an overabundance of ideas I want to do already? (Learn about how an outsider’s perspective can help you in your business.)

Am I ready to hire a coach?  (Find out how I knew I needed a coach that may resonate with you.)

Will taking this scary step of working with a coach really build my confidence as a photographer and business person? (Hear about how a couple of my clients have experienced more confidence.)

A couple of other things you may have questions about:

Will I find more clients?
A:  YES!  As you do the work of opening your eyes to the possibilities that are in your life right now you will also find more clients.  Most likely, in places you hadn’t considered before.

Am I going to learn how to market myself?
A:  YES!  Most likely you’ll be thinking of ways to market yourself that surprise you.  When you being seeing in a new way you start discovering totally great ways to connect with your audience that you hadn’t realized would work for you until now.

A little story:
By the end of a 30 minute call with me, one photographer was ready to put into action a plan that he hadn’t considered as a viable long term stream of income until I helped him see the possibility.  When he put the idea easily into action, he and his partner made $16k with huge potential to make more money in the future in an audience where they are completely unique and are giving their gifts in a way that gives them the ultimate thing they want most:  time with their family and friends, doing what they love on multiple levels.

Working with a coach, for each person, is different and very powerful.

If you missed my last two emails, you can check them out here:

1.  The Call That Changed My Life
2.  Five Steps to a Breakthrough (before the end of the year!).

Write to me!

What questions are in your mind right now about coaching? Send me your questions by replying to this email, private messaging me on Facebook or writing on my FB wall, or here in the comments on my blog.

xoxo,
Davina

PS I can’t wait to share my 3 coaching options with you on Monday, December 29th!  Make sure to keep your eye out for that email and blog post!

December 23, 2014

Five Steps to a Breakthrough (before the end of the year!)

Wow! Christmas Day is almost here and so is the New Year!

Crazy!I hope you’re almost ready for some downtime, rest, relaxation, and hanging out with the people you love most. :)

A few days ago I sent you an email about The Call That Changed My Life. I loved hearing about your action steps and you hopes for the new year in your business.

Today, I made you a little video about the Five Steps to Breakthrough What You’ve Been Avoiding in your Life and Business. It’s already helped my private coaching clients and I want it to help you as you head into the New Year!

You can CLICK HERE to view Five Steps to a Breakthrough or click the image below to watch.

 

What are you thinking?

I’m super excited about how these steps may help you in your business, your life, your family…please write to me by replying to this email, private messaging me on Facebook or writing on my FB wall, or my blog.  I’d love to read about what you wrote for your 5 steps!

Also, if you have any questions about my coaching program, I’d love to answer them for you.

xoxo,
Davina

December 18, 2014

The Call That Changed My Life

This is for all of you…

I was sitting at my computer like I had so many days and years before…editing, writing, and feeling like things were good but knowing they could be better.  I wanted to break through where I was in my business and move into more…more of something.

the shiny stuff

A new emailing program that I had signed up for seemed like THE answer (like so many other shiny objects I had purchased before). That afternoon I was scrolling through the email FB group looking for help when I came across someone who was offering a complimentary session to just talk about my business.

When I signed up to chat I hoped she would have answers for me and assumed she would have a program or something for me to purchase.  When she called me I knew I didn’t have a cent I could give her but I really wanted help!

the phone call

During the course of our call I knew I needed to work with her but I kept thinking there was no way I could hire her.  Everything in my account was meant to go somewhere else.

When she told me about her coaching program I tensed up and told her I needed to talk to my husband.  In the moment I said that, I knew that he would be totally supportive of whatever I felt like I needed to do for my business.  This was my call.  I could step into this if I really wanted to.

what I didn’t expect

When I said YES! to coaching with her I felt like I had completely stepped into my own power.  Suddenly, I knew I had been giving my power away for longer than I had realized.

Working with my coach I broke through so many things I had been allowing myself to be limited by, things I just wasn’t seeing.  There were opportunities and money all around me.  I just needed someone who was further down the road than I was to show me what I wasn’t seeing.

During that first month of working with my coach I made 5 times what I made the previous month and started seeing opportunity after opportunity that had been in my life that I wasn’t seeing.  It was extremely powerful for me!

Since then I’ve experienced breakthrough after breakthrough and seen my business in a whole new way.

Here are a few highlights I’ve learned since that day:

#1:  You CAN take back control of your life and business.
For me, I realized I was constantly giving myself an ‘out’ for what I wasn’t doing that really mattered to me.  I convinced myself that I had done everything I could think of–when really I was caught up in stories that just were more excuses as to why my business wasn’t going where I wanted it to go.

action step for you: what excuses are you giving yourself for not moving ahead? write three reasons you’re listening to these excuses

#2:  I stopped buying the stories.
In our industry we have a lot of stories that we tell ourselves to perpetuate giving us an ‘OUT.’

Some of these stories I bought at face value or would occasionally buy into if they fit my particular thing I was up against.

I’ve come to see these stories in a much different way. I see them as ways of believing that aren’t really real.  These stories keep us from believing in what’s possible.

Things like:

*photographers can’t really make money in the winter
*all of those newbie/amateur photographers are messing up and undercutting the industry
*the rules about who is allowed to start a workshop and who isn’t
*people just aren’t into what I take pictures of or my style of photography
*how long you have to be in the industry to start sharing your knowledge
*selling to photographers means you’re a sell out
*no one in my area is willing to pay what I’m worth
*if you teach or create products for photographers and you’re not a particular person then you shouldn’t be creating or teaching
*and so many other stories

action step for you:  ask yourself why you believe the stories you believe, see what you have to say

#3:  I changed my mind.
Before I changed my mind, business would get rough and I tended to give my power away by believing these stories and creating stories for myself that gave me permission to stay playing small and a victim to my circumstances and situation.  I would stop seeing what was possible and start seeing only the ways that nothing was working out for me.

When I hired my coach I realized how much (and how often) my subconscious part of me had taken over, keeping me protected and away from pain and hurt.

doing the opposite? what?

Changing my mind meant doing the opposite of staying safe and the opposite of worrying about what other people would think of me.  It also opened up my mind to possibilities and opportunities I had not even considered before.

action step for you:  write three way you are you playing it safe and three ways you want to start playing bigger

what happened

Once I started looking at my life and business in this new way I began to see all of the opportunities that had been pulling at me but that I had been pushing away, telling myself I couldn’t do more, be more because of my circumstances and situations.  I would look longingly at what others were doing and say, “Why not me?”
When in reality exactly what I wanted and longed for was already in my life.  I just couldn’t see the opportunities for what they were.

doing these three things will help you, too

What you long for is in your life right now, too.  Whatever you want, there is a way for you to have it (and it’s all legal! lol).  For every problem you face there is a solution.  And that solution is in your life, for the taking, right now.  It’s just a matter of opening your eyes to seeing it.

If you want a successful business making $20k, $200k, or $2million! then what you need, all of the resources, are in your life right now to make it happen.

You’re going to hear about this coaching program, I’m  launching soon, and a lot of you are going to want to join because inside you, you’ll be thinking, “Oh man, that’s exactly what I need.  Exactly!”

And about one second later you’re going to say, “But I can’t do it.”  You may say that because you don’t think you have the money, or maybe because you’ve got lots of obligations, or four kids, or you’re suddenly afraid of what it will mean to your life if you sign up.

That first feeling you felt is your higher self telling you that this program is what will hep you get you where you want to go.

what bears have to do with it

The second feeling you’re having about there being no money, time, or the fear of what may or may not happen…that’s your subconscious  protecting you from something scary!  In it’s own way it’s yelling, “BEAR!! BEAR!! Run for your life!!!”  Because your subconscious doesn’t like change.  It thinks change is bad and scary and if you’re feeling that feeling there must be a BEAR around (run!).

When everything is relaxed and staying just the way it is (even if the way things are isn’t what you REALLY want or isn’t serving you) your subconscious loves it!  Why?  Because it means that you’re safe!  And keeping you safe is what your subconscious DOES.

Do you really want to live a safe life?  Or do you want to say to your subconscious, “Thank you for wanting to keep me safe.  BUT I’m going to go hang out with the stuff that scares me and gets me closer to the me I’m meant to be (because there’s no bear here).  Thanks anyway.  You can keep doing your job but for now, I’m going to do the scary stuff and BE AWESOME!”

ready to be awesome?

I decided safe and playing small wasn’t for me.  BEING AWESOME is who I am.  BEING AWESOME is who YOU are!

When I stepped into being coached I stepped into being more of who I’m really meant to be on so many levels.  It’s been crazy but I love that I’m discovering, everyday, at 44 years old, what it takes to be me. Really me.

If you’re a person who doesn’t want to keep playing small in your business then you’ll want to keep an eye out for the next email I’ll be sending you in a couple of days.

To playing bigger,

Davina

PS  If some piece of this resonates with you, _please_ share your thoughts or action step thoughts (that would be awesome!) on my blog HERE or on my Facebook page HERE.  I’d LOVE to hear from you!