On Monday I started replying to the question below and realized that I needed to deliver this to you in a series. This is part 2! If you missed part one, you can see it HERE.
Q: I’m having such a hard time getting clients and sometimes I can’t get past that I’m probably doing my business all wrong. I wonder if I’m ever going to get anywhere significant with my business. What can I do when I get stuck?
Four ways to get past your subconscious trying to stop you:
Have you ever wondered why you’re not getting the clients you want?
Usually, the first thing that used to happen to me when things would begin to go wrong, not work out for me, or it would seem like everything was against me I’d immediately go into my head.
I would start saying things like this to myself and anyone who would listen (I’ve added some statements that I’ve heard many other photographers say, too, when commiserating):
* “Maybe I’m just not meant to have a business right now.”
* “My kids are most important to me, so maybe this is a sign from the universe that I’m supposed to NOT do my business.”
* “The economy is in a terrible place right now. No one is buying anything Especially not luxury things like photography.”
* “No one around here really values photography.”
* “If I’m going to have any chance of getting someone to book me, I’m going to have to do some major educating.”
* “Everyone wants to pay hardly anything for photography.”
* “There are so many DIY people in my area. No one wants to actually PAY for photography.”
* “Not a day goes past that some newbie enters the industry and undercuts all of the years I’ve been in business.”
Where are you looking?
When things get complicated and difficult in our businesses we want to look around for something, someone, anything to excuse our shortcoming or pin the blame on. Anyone but ourselves. When we feel like we’ve been busting it like crazy we don’t want to see the ways that we’ve not been measuring up. That’s absolutely no fun to face.
Becoming aware of what we are saying, how we are thinking, what affect it’s having on the state of you and on the state of your business. Is it helping? Is it opening up all kinds of ideas and opportunities for you to continue to believe what you’re believing? Why are you believing what you’re saying? Is it giving you an out? A reason to not do the work you know you need to do? What are you resisting?
What happens when you start paying attention?
When you can become aware and begin honestly answering these types of questions you’ll be able to start seeing more clearly.
You will become aware not just to what’s stopping you but also to what’s keeping you paralyzed. This idea and these questions are applicable, not just to our businesses but to our parenting and relationships as well.
Opportunities you never saw before will suddenly appear in your life. Not because they weren’t there before but because you were not able to see them.
I used to give a lot of the excuses, justifications, and explanations about why my business wasn’t working/thriving or why clients weren’t knocking down my door.
Now I know that so much of what I was doing back then was not being aware, closing myself off to possibility in the process.
Why was I stuck?
I came to a point where I knew **I** was the reason I wasn’t moving forward and why my business wasn’t taking off. I finally became aware of what I was doing to keep myself stuck.
But I didn’t know what I didn’t know.
I couldn’t see my way out of it. Even though I was pretty sick and tired of being in limbo land with my business, I still didn’t know my next step. And even more bugged that I had already built an incredible business once and was struggling so much to build it a second time, I didn’t realize that so much of it all came down to awareness.
Once I started working with my coach she began helping me to be more aware of what I did and didn’t do. I began seeing how I would go to the edge of booking someone and then pull back. I started to see how I expected people to come to me rather than stepping into my own power and going to the people I wanted to work with. I realized how paralyzed I was in so many instances by worrying about what other people thought.
Awareness showed me the truth.
The truth was that I was afraid not that there was no one who wanted to book the kind of sessions I shoot. The truth was that I wasn’t acting on opportunities to work with people and following through. The truth was that I wasn’t going to where my ideal clients were because I was afraid. The truth was that me staying behind my computer screen was less scary than what someone might say about me as a photographer or business owner.
When I saw the truth choices opened up to me. I could stay where I was or could step into the unknown of my gifts, talents, potential, and who knew what else.
The choices were exciting and the world seemed to open up again in a way it hadn’t been opened to me before I became aware of the ways I was keeping myself stuck.
1. pay attention
2. notice when you blame someone or something else or a circumstance for why you’re stuck, angry, bugged, or frustrated
3. when you notice that you’re blaming ask yourself, “how does me blaming someone else allow me to stay stuck?”
4. listen for the truth
Stay tuned! I’m going to share how the other two things, gratitude and action, will help you breakthrough the stuff you’re believing about yourself and your business. Don’t miss the rest of this series. Sign up for my email list!
PS If things like this keep you from doing what you know you’re really supposed to do in this world, sign up for a call with me HERE. I’d love to talk!
Davina Fear is Business Coach for Creative Women who want to be more fearless in their life and business. She’s also a Familyness Adventurer and Life Story Photographer. She has a Parks and Recreation addiction. Literally.